Sunday, December 28, 2014

[BH3] It's time to nurse that hangover - the Hangover Hash is back!

Roll out of bed and get your bum to the start for some delicious mimosas and struggle through whatever devious trail amber and I think up.

What: The Hangover hash
When:Crack o' Noon New Year's Day. (That's 12:00pm 1st January 2015)
Where: Walker Ranch Loop Trailhead
Hares: Beano & Amber Alert
Hash Cash: $5
Bring: your hot bod, $5, shag bag, and your hangover
Trail: A to B, complete with shig and mimosas
Hash Crash/DD:
D'Erections: Go up Flagstaff Rd. toward Ned past the Meyer's Homestead Trailhead and make a left into the Walker Ranch Loop Trailhead.

--

Thursday, December 18, 2014

Naughty Holiday Celebration - Trail #721

Me Mee Meee!!!!!

Lacy things....the wife is missin'
Didn't ask.....her permission
I'm wearin' her clothes.
Her silk pantyhose.
Walkin' around in womens' underwear....

Get your hashmas songs in order for THE LAST BH3 trail of the year! Saturday's evening trail (on 12/20/14) will start at 5:00 pm at Settlers Park in Boulder, Colorado!!!!

Location:  West end of Pearl Street at its junction with Canyon Boulevard. (The parking lot is on your right as you leave Boulder heading to Nederland).

Hares:  Brrrrgggghhhh and Cockchester

Time:  5 o'clock pm

Cost: five dolla make ya holla

What to wear:  your sluttiest Santa, elf or reindeer outfit.  Simply....anything to rival the best nudey pics of Beano's mom.

Bring: Headlamp. Headlamp. Headlamp. A change of warm clothing.  And your singing voice!

Expect a relatively short trail.  "Relatively". Prob longer than 2 miles and less than 12 miles.
Expect a public appearance of your boobs, cocks and ass.   And expect a fun circle filled with holiday cheer!

But WAIT!!! There's MORE!!!!!

The On On On will be at the home of our lovely Cockchester, this year's Beer Mile winner, Amber Alert, and their fearless protector, Moe! Please bring alcohol for continued debauchery. And, a hash gift for a pleasant white elephant exchange.  Lady Days: your collection of Beano's mom pics are immediately disqualified.  No questions asked!

Also, if you're coming to the On On On, it would be wonderful if you could bring some food to share with the kennel! Thanks Wanks!

Thursday, December 04, 2014

[BH3] BH3 #720

Since All-American Cumstain only knows about Facebook, not anything so old fashioned as email or webpages, I'll forward this announcement:

====================

Who knew Hashers were bad at organizing shit? Well, come by for a pickup hash this Saturday at 1:69. For those of you who do not know what a pickup hash is, here are the spark notes: everyone hares, we get lost, we get drunk, we get more lost then we finish and drink more. For those of you who do not know what spark notes are: you are a nerd.

What to bring: no 5 dolla required for a hola this time. Bring either beer or an awesome snack, I will provide flour and a rack of the cheapest beer available at the emporium. Also bring: ID, change of shoes, favorite Hall and Oates album, your graphing calculator, more beer, wine and cheese, a good attitude.

What not to bring: underwear, a can't do attitude, blackface, weapons, the Nixon Tapes.

Where: South Boulder Campus (xc course).

Time: 1:69 Mounting Time

D'erections: Ha, you thought I would Google it for you.

Dog/Strollers: who knows! it is a pickup hash. Dogs in strollers will be fine.

--
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Colorado Info:
Harrier.net
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Monday, November 24, 2014

[BH3] BH3 #719 - 11/28 - Black Friday Hangover Hash

What: I know most of you will still be in a haze of tryptophan and family overdose, so the hares will take it real easy on you. There is no theme. There are no water crossings, no snow or ice, and best of all no beer. Wait!? What?! Just kidding. There will be all the booze!

When: Friday, November 28th at 12:15pm


Hares: Just Jon's virgin lay! and Pippi

Hash Cash: Five Bucks

Bring: Change of shoes, warm things, thermoses filled with hot boozy bevies, black hooded sweatshirts, your new Best Buy credit card debt, leftover turkey, your grandma, Beano's mom, and all the leftover cranberry sauce that you can juggle. 

Trail: A to Aish, circle will be inside if our tits can hang with the cold. 

Dogs/Babies: Dogs will absolutely love this trail. We scouted with a stroller and made the children walk. It is baby bjorn friendly, but not stroller. 

D'erections: The link to the damn place is in this post. Buses and carpooling is strongly encouraged. 

--
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Wednesday, November 19, 2014

BH3 #718 - 11/22 - The You Can’t Have Any Pudding Until You Beat Your Meat Hash

What:  The You Can’t Have Any Pudding Until You Beat Your Meat Hash - I’ve been living in Boulder for the past 12 weeks now and I’ve met many a homeless person with an iPad, seen a lot of pretty nature and sh*t, and had my fair share of organic free-range placenta burgers (it really saddens me to see those little guys caged up). I’d like to explore a bit of the area that isn’t so idyllic. So, in honor of the almost 30 something-th anniversary of the release of Pink Floyd’s semen(al) album “The Wall”, let’s check out a bit of this place that lets us know we’re just part of the machine, maaaan. So dress up in the way that you interpreted the movie, sober or not.
When:   11/22 @ 1:69
Where:  Upslope Brewing
      1898 S Flatiron Ct
      Boulder, CO 80301, NOT THE NORTH BOULDER LOCATION!
Hares:  All American Cumstain and Just Sarkis
Hash Cash:  How much mescaline can you get with $5?
Bring:  A light brite, warm clothes, snow pants or no pants, scopolamine, moon-walking-out-of-a-potentially-bad-situation, pudding with proof in it (preferably higher than 100), edjukashun, teachers not leaving kids alone (ask Amber for tips), Beano’s Mom’s Mom, triangular prisms
Trail:  A(animals)–A’(tom Heart Mother)
Dog/Stroller Amigoly:  Pups will have a blast
D'Erections:  Just ask Alice

Wednesday, November 05, 2014

BH3 #717 - 11/8 - The No F*cking Theme Hash

What:  The No Fucking Theme Hash - Let's stop pretending we're Weird-Ball going through his mom's closet and just dress like a bunch of half-mind hashers.
When:   11/8 @ 1:69 HST (that's an hour earlier than recent hashes because boobs and balls look best with a little daylight)
Where:  Gravity Brewing -1150 Pine St, Louisville
Hares:  Cockchester and Amber Alert
Hash Cash:  .0146 Bitcoin  ($5)
Bring:  Cranium lamps or fleshlights, dry clothes (it's a Cockchester trail), virgins, weed candy, the award, pube trimmers (we'll hold Pod down), the grainy Lady Dayz and Beano's mom sex tape, new shoes, and pumpkin spice lube.
Trail:  A-A'
Dog/Stroller Friendly:  The doge should be fine.
D'Erections:  AltaVista that shit!

OnOn!
Amber Alert and Cockchester

Monday, October 20, 2014

Thanksgiving Hash


WHAT:  Hash Thanksgiving 2014 – Feast, football, trail etc.  Giant TV for football.  Semi-pro kitchen for the cooks.  We’ll have a big turkey and some other stuff but sides and dessert are potluck.  Please coordinate with the hare.  NEW FOR THIS YEAR: Good heat downstairs - watch football without a blanket!  Upgraded SuperMax dog fencing in the back yard!  Plenty of crash space so no worries about driving home.  PLEASE RSVP!

WHEN:  Thanksgiving Day - Thursday, 27 November.    We’ll start cooking & drinking about 9:00 AM so come early, drop a shot of rum in your coffee & cook or just hang-out.  Dinner at 2:00 PM followed by a shiggylicious hike on Green Mountain for those who want to walk-off dinner.  We’ll go ‘til late so come as late as you want.

WHERE:  Mutha Ducker’s place:  13421 West Ohio DRIVE, Lakewood, 80228.  Note that the DRIVE in the address is REALLY IMPORTANT.

BRING:  Side dishes, desserts, snacks, other stuff… more is better.  There’ll be plenty of cheap beer & soft drinks but if you want wine or fancy beer then bring it.  Bring hiking boots for the post-prandial ramble.

HARE:  Mutha Ducker.  Questions?  Call yo Mutha on one of his mobiles: 303-845-2125 or 832-766-3458 or email AL@NaturalFractures.com.  PLEASE RSVP!

DOGS:  YES!  Ultra dog-friendly, as always.  Fenced back yard, dogs allowed in house, dogs allowed on furniture, leg-humping OK…

KIDS:  YES!  Bring your larvae!

FROM DENVER:  Take US 6/ 6th Ave west to the Union Blvd/Simms St. Exit and turn left onto Union.  Go 1 mile and turn right onto W Alameda Pkwy.  Go 0.9 miles and turn right onto W Ohio AVENUE.  Go 0.5 miles and turn left onto Beech.  Make an immediate right onto W Ohio DRIVE – the turn is only 250 ft after you turn onto Beech.  It’s the first house on the right, not the house on the corner.

FROM BOULDER:  Take 93 S to Golden where you’ll merge onto US 6 E/6th Ave.  Go 6.4 miles on 6 to the Union Blvd/ Simms St. exit.  Turn right onto Union.  Go 1 mile and turn right onto W Alameda Pkwy.  Go 0.9 miles and turn right onto W Ohio AVENUE.  Go 0.5 miles and turn left onto Beech.  Make an immediate right onto W Ohio DRIVE – the turn is only 250 ft after you turn onto Beech.  It’s the first house on the right, not the house on the corner.

FROM FT. COLLINS OR COLORADO SPRINGS:  Take I-25 towards Denver to US 6/6th Avenue west.  Take 6 west to the Union Blvd/Simms St. Exit and turn left onto Union.  Go 1 mile and turn right onto W Alameda Pkwy.  Go 0.9 miles and turn right onto W Ohio AVENUE.  Go 0.5 miles and turn left onto Beech.  Make an immediate right onto W Ohio DRIVE – the turn is only 250 ft after you turn onto Beech.  It’s the first house on the right, not the house on the corner.


Thanks.

ON-ON!

Mutha Ducker / Al

[BH3] Halloween Trail Sat 10/25

What:  It's Halloween.  Let's put our heads in pumpkins and run around naked! 
Wear:  A Halloween costume.  The sluttier and scarier, the better. 

When:  Saturday October 25th @ 2:69 HST (aka 3:09 MST)
Where:  Centennial Trail Head (Aka, "Mt Sanitas Trailhead").  On the Left, soon after Mapleton becomes Sunshine Canyon.

Hares:  Closest Dick'll Do and Just Joe

Hash Cash: 5 Dollar Cash Money! (Make it rain!)

Bring:  This is an actual trail.  Not a pub crawl like Halloweens past!  Tricks, recreational marijuana-laced treats, a completely justifiable fear of racoons, The Award, your shiggiest shoes, crates for apple picking, virgins, extra warmth, extra warm virgins, and a headlamp.

Trail: A to Aish. 

Dog/Stroller Friendly:  Yes dog (maybe leash though?).  Definitely not stroller.

On-After: Condo of Closest Dick'll Do for some drinks, then we can head to Pearl?  Corner of Portland and Broadway - detailed instructions provided at hash.  Just Joe and Dick'll Do will NOT be taking on the responsibility of feeding any of you gluten free/cruelty free/vegan/low glycemic index/organic/raw/ free range wankers!  We can order delivery, and we will be by restaurants and Ideal Market.

D'Erections:  Follow the link.
On on!
-Closest Dick'll Do and Just Joe.


Monday, October 06, 2014

Be Aware of Breasts

What:  It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month and Hashers don't NEED to be reminded about breasts but we can always learn more. So let's run around and remind people to get drunk and feel themselves up.

Wear:  Ladies wear Pink (for lady-boob cancer) and guys wear Light Blue (for man-pec/boob cancer -- yes, it's a thing). 

When:  SUNDAY, October 12 @ 1:69 HST (aka 2:09 MST)

Where:  CU-Boulder South Campus (Racist Translation: CU Cross Country Course)

Hares:  Liza's Lady Dayz and All-American Cum Stain

Hash Cash:  5 doll-hairs

Bring:  A taste for terrible alcohol (all you homebrewing fart sniffing craft aficionados, myself included, need to be reminded that there is no room for class at a Hash -- we are going to make this difficult for the strongest of stomachs), at least two pictures of Beano's Mom that you carry in your wallet, ID, lack of respect and/or dignity for yourself and others, stamina, a knowledge and disregard of all Surgeon General warnings, and The Award (Cap'n Swallows, I believe, has The Award... or is The Award, who's to say?). 

Trail:  A[ss] to A[ss]

Dog/Stroller Friendly:  Yaup... well, prolly.

On-After:  All are welcomed to walk around the corner to Lady Dayz and Cum Stain's apartment, Just Cassaundra (Apt 104), for socializing and condom durability testing. Bring some cash for pizza and feel free to bring a dish to pass, snacks, booze, and/or old issues of People (it's a fetish thing and it is very, very disgusting). Sorry, no dogs allowed in our apartment building. 

DD/D'Erections:  Sorry, wife took the car to Essex park for the weekend. Won't be back until Sunday. I can give you a ride Sunday, if you like?

Anyong!
Lady Dayz and Cum Stain
--
Boulder H3 Info:
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@BoulderH3

Colorado Info:
Harrier.net
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Tuesday, September 23, 2014

Boulder Hash #714 - 9/27 @1:69 HST - Keepin' it Weird

What:  As the conventional wisdom goes:  People from Denver think people from Boulder are weird, but people from Boulder think people from Ned are *really* weird.  In that spirit let's venture up into the patchouli-scented mountains of our neighbors to the west so that we hashers can, for one glorious afternoon, feel a little bit normal.  

When: Saturday 9/27 @ 1:69 HST (that's 2:19 MST)

Where:  The Pioneer Inn 15 E. First Street, Nederland

Hares:  Amber Alert and Cockchester

Hash Cash:  5 Dolla

Bring:  Dry and warm clothes, fleshlights, a signed copy of "101 Ways to Get with Beano's Mom" by Lady Dayz, healing crystals, vessels, hemp underwear, and The Award. 

Trail:  A-A'

Dog/Stroller Friendly:  Doggies who can share nicely with mountain bikers should be ok.  Please have a leash (someone has to keep POD in control)

Hash Crash/DD:  The N bus from Boulder is a great option.  Only $4 cash each way!  If you're on the one arriving in Ned at 2:41, don't worry, we'll still be pre-lubing.  If you're on an earlier one, you're hashing right.

D'Erections:  Google that shit!

OnOn!
Amber and Cockchester


Friday, September 12, 2014

Over a year of hash-flash backlog…

Since I started hashing, I've taken over a thousand pictures on BH3 trails, but have uploaded something closer to… none of them.  As a first step towards sharing hash flash soon after trail, I've gone through pictures from 30 trails over the time I've been hashing, selected 160-plus pictures, and am sharing them now.

(Pictures should be reasonably sfw, but if you're in a picture you'd like not to be shared on the internet, just let me know and I'll remove it.)

Photos begin below, starting from when I first joined you all last May…

Thursday, September 11, 2014

Remembering Tupac Shakur and Mis-Management Election Results Hash

What: Dress like your best 80's/90's gangsta and get elected! BH3 #713

When: This Saturday at 3pm (9/13)

Where: Maxwell Lake (We have had beer checks here in the past.)

Hares: Beano and Pippi

Hash Cash: 5 dollas

Bring: Yo gang colors, 'tude, forties, a boom box, diamond stud earring, several backup dancers, your MC skillz, a microphone, parachute pants, and bag of peanut M&M's (for Pippi)  

Trail: A-A with chance of sunshine, rain, sleet or snow. 

Dog/Stroller: Both should be cool. We also like buns in the oven. 


(This link is for a random house on the block. Park and then meet at the lake.) 

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

BH3 #712 - Rock and Rain Hash

What: Rock and Rain Labor Sunday Hash

When: Sunday August 31st at 3pm

Where: Marshall Mesa Trailhead, Yes, Head. 

Hare: Pippi 

Hash Cash: five bucks

Bring: A rain slicker, boom box, Hammer pants, crop top, change of clothes, virgins, cammo paint, umbrella and your favorite candy bar.

Trail: A to A with some tricky bits in between. If it's raining, there is a plan B for circle. Plan B?

Dog/Stroller: Puppies will manage but strollers will not. Get a baby backpack, that should be okay. 

Hash Crash and DD: You can always sleep in my bathtub if you need to. And it's always a good idea to bring a sober friend. 


Friday, August 22, 2014

[BH3] Emergency hash!

Hey wankers, we have a void in hashing this weekend. UNACCEPTABLE! So, I propose we have an emergency hash to fill our empty weekend.

What: Boulder emergency hash
When: 3pm Saturday 
Where: Manhattan Middle School
Hares: Beano ++
Hash Cash: $5
Bring: A whistle, virgins, your left foot,  back up whistle. 
Trail: A to A


--
ON ON
Beano

--
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Thursday, August 21, 2014

Mis-management elections!

Hello wankers and wankettes!

It's the time we've all been waiting for--hash elections! Yay! Who wants in on this goodness?

You will not have absolute power, but you will be corrupted, absolutely.

There are several roles for which you may nominate yourself or others. In keeping with the typical hash tradition of not being traditional, we are going to mix up the Mis-management possibilities. There are all kinds of roles silly hares can take upon themselves or be elected to fulfill. And that is why we want to expand the traditional roles to include a couple more options. 

Check out the P2H4 Position Descriptions: 

Or the Boston Hash:

There might be some new positions that interest you. And new positions should always interest you! 

The term is roughly from September to September. Please email Beano or Pippi with your nominations and we will be setting up a Google poll by Sept. 6th and the poll will close Sept. 12th. Newly elected officials will be announced at the Sept. 13th hash.

May "G" bless and keep you,

Pippi and Beano

--
Boulder H3 Info:
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@BoulderH3

Colorado Info:
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Tuesday, August 05, 2014

[BH3] BH3 #710: R U Cumming to Yank Dicks? - Sunday 8/10 @ 5PM

Whoops, slight miscalculation. The Pleasant View Fields parking lot will not be open tomorrow. Start of trail tomorrow, Sat. Aug. 10th, is MOVED slightly west to East Palo Park, which is just south of Corriente Dr, which doesn't have a parking lot, but has plenty of street parking. It doesn't show up on Google Maps, but it's located at 4340 Corriente Dr. Time is the same.
https://goo.gl/maps/mv3tp

Again: START OF TRAIL IS CHANGED to East Palo Park, 4340 Corriente Dr.

Since the Flatlander Campout is on the weekend of the 16th, and the Fart Collins hash is this coming Saturday, this next Boulder hash is moving to this coming SUNDAY, August 10th.

What: BH3 #710: R U Cumming to Yank Dicks?
When: Sunday August 10th at 5PM
Where: Pleasant View Soccer Fields East Palo Park, 4340 Corriente Dr.
Hares: RU Cummingtonite and Weird Ball Yank-a-Dick
Hash Cash: $5
Bring: A change of shoes and socks, a change of underwear (or just don't wear any), whistles, duck calls, rock samples, polka samples, dicks (attached or unattached) and (of course) virgins.
Trail: A-A
Dog/Stroller Friendly: Dogs are fine (bring a leash) but strollers are questionable.
D'Erections: Meet at the parking lot at the north-east corner of the Pleasant View Soccer Fields, off of 47th St.
East Palo Park, 4340 Corriente Dr, just south of Corriente Dr.  There should be plenty of street parking.


Looking for the pack day-of? Call RUC or WB at (626) 277-5655 or (303) 717-7994.

--
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Colorado Info:
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[BH3] Fully Mooned Hash in Fort Collins Saturday Night 8/9

Hares: Yeast Infection and Fatal if Swallowed, live haring 'cause that's how we roll
What: Fully Mooned Hash #?? 
Where: Starting from William Oliver's, 2608 S Timberline Rd, Fort Collins, CO 80525, next door to the King Sooper's, just south of Drake/Timberline
When: Saturday, August 9th, 6:69pm (which had to be explained to me, 7:09pm if you prefer)
Why: We got talked into haring because we got all married and shit a few years ago and running by the light of the full moon is our idea of a romantic anniversary.
What to Bring: $7 hash cash, ID on trail, virgins (the bar owner of the start is threatening to cum!), headlamps, shagbags with spare clothing.  Probably a good idea to leave your dogs and babies at home.
Lost or lonely?: Call Yeast at 970-817-3903
Prelube: Starting 6pm.  Cum early.  Our trail will be much more entertaining if you get a couple of whisky drinks in your belly first.

--
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Wednesday, July 30, 2014

[BH3] BH3 #709 - Slutty Asspirations - Saturday 8/2 @ 3PM

What: BH3 #709 - Slutty Asspirations * 
When: Saturday August 2nd at 3PM
Where: North Boulder Park
Hares: Liza's Lady Dayz and Captain Swallows 
Hash Cash: $5
Bring: Sunblock and an umbrella. *Remember when you were a kid and wanted to be a fireman, a veterinarian, a doctor or lawyer? Well, your dreams have come true! Only, you've had to bang your way to the top. No dirty deed was too much to ensure your success. Please dress up as your childhood dream profession--butt slutty. Think Halloween meets career day. 
Trail: A - A
Dog/Stroller Friendly: Dogs are encouraged but strollers will not make it.

--
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Tuesday, July 15, 2014

BH3 #708 - Tour De Franzia


What: BH3 #708 - Tour De Franzia (NOT A BASH, you will be on foot)
When: Saturday July 19th 2PM
Where: north most parking lot along Stazio Drive near Gerald Stazio Softball Fields Stazio Dr, Boulder, CO 80301
Hare: Mach 1.Whore
Monies: $5
Bring: ALL THE SPANDEX, Cycling apparel, chammis, helmets, hairless legs, jerkish demeanor,   sunscreen, cool kid eyewear, over pay for everything,  ID, perhaps a box of vino.
Dogs: sure but there will be cars and rushing waters
Cats: ok
Trail: short and sweet pavement pounder or 69 mile shiggyfest with multiple water crossings.  


Tuesday, July 01, 2014

[BH3] BH3 #707

What: BH3 #707 - The 'Merca Hash 
When: SUNDAY July 6th at 5pm 
Where: Gunbarrel, Colorado! Vindication Brewery 6880 Winchester Court Unit F
Hares: Goats Gone Wild && Just Barry [720-971-4049]
Hash Cash: $5 (plus some cash for the bar)
Bring: ID, Red Cocks, Blue Balls, and lily White Butts, Sunblock, and your best Haliburton whip crack
Trail: A - A'
Dogs: We will be hitting up at least one bar, so it's up to you if you want them tied up in the heat.

--
 
Toni Rosati

Data Curator - National Snow and Ice Data Center
Ph.D. student Geography - University of Colorado, Boulder

--
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Thursday, June 19, 2014

BH3 #706: No Man's land

What: BH3 #706 - The 
When: Saturday 21st 6pm sharp-ish
Where: Golden, Colorado! Jeff Co Light Rail station (100 Jefferson County Pkwy
Golden, CO 80419)
Hares: Beano && Five Finger Cunt Punch
Hash Cash: $5
Bring: ID, Sunblock, Whistle, your beer drinking boots
Trail: A - dB/dt
Dogs: End is very bar like so if you're ok with them being in the car or whatnot then yes.
D'Erections: From Boulder enter Hell (that's CO 93 south) until you reach the shining reprieve from single-lane hell that is Golden. Continue onto US 6  until you make make a Left onto Jefferson Rd. and the light rail station will be on your left past the train tracks. From there you will bask in the glory that beer and more beer.

For those who are less literate/ more computer savy (tl;dr):
--
ON ON
Beano

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

BH3 Hash #702: TOGA TOGA TOGA

What: TOGA HASH + Memorial Day Bolder Boulder Interruption

When: Start 9 AM on MONDAY 5/26. This should give you racists enough time to r*n your silly race and meet us. The pack will kindly mark trail, so if you are a little late then follow the flour.

Where: Howard Hueston Park

D'Erections: Meet at Howard Hueston Park: https://goo.gl/maps/cgXMd Look for street parking--you should be able to park on 34th street; take Foothills to Valmont (going west) then right/north on 34th. The Bolder Boulder may interfere with other routes to the park: check the official route to know where you have to drive around, or better yet just bike or walk there. http://www.bolderboulder.com/Page/Find/Maps

Hares: Ceasar Weird Ball Yankus-o-Dickus and Machus 1.Whoricleese

Trail: A-A

Hash Cash: $5 for the hash. We will do some breakfast snacks before and BBQ after. We will provide some food, and will have a tip jar if you want to contribute to food fund. This is rain or shine event, weather looks to be in the 70s so we'll grab a keg of milk stout.

Bring: a toga, laurel wreath, virgins for the Bacchanalia, any other food you'd like at the BBQ...

Dog/Stroller Friendly: Dogs and kiddies are not allowed in the Bolder Boulder race, which we'll be ducking through; sorry. They should be okay at the park for the BBQ and circle.

Contact: Got caught up in the Bolder Boulder and lost the pack? Were racist enough to run the Bolder Boulder, but not enough to finish in time to find the pack? Call Weird Ball at (303) 717-7994, and I'll get back to you at the next beer check.

BOULDER HASH CAMPOUT WEEKEND

What:  Boulder Hash House Harriers 3rd Anal Campout Weekend

When: June 6 - June 8, 2014

Weekend Theme: RAINBOWS & UNICORNS

Hares: Lil Miss Muffet and Cockchester

Where: Out near Chambers Lake (way up Poudre Canyon)

Why: Because the tics and skeeters need to get drunk too

What to Bring: Bottle of wine and some cheese (for the wine & cheese party), Camping Shit, shit to shit in the woods with, virgins, Unicorns, any additional booze that you and yer liver may require, food for the weekend, the award, wood if you are too lazy to go ten feet into the forest and find some.

How much will this cost me? $25
Pay via PayPal to Powers.Alan@gmail.com - pay as  GIFT, or else we get docked a paypal fee

What do I get out of it? Beer for the weekend, shitty shiggy fucken trail set by Muffet and Cockchester, some sorta swag (TBD)

Dogs? YES!!!!!!

Duh'Erections: Get on hwy 14 and head west up Poudre Canyon. Turn right on Chambers Lake Rd, Look for signs ON THE LEFT

Friday 6/6: mid afternoon
-Hashers arrive, set up their shit
-Short trail (still need a hare) 
-Wine & Cheese Party
-Circle
-Midnight Naked Hash: Hare -Amber Alert

Saturday 6/7:
-Wake up and get your hair o' the dog on
-Hash (start time will be announced)
-Circle

Sunday 6/8:
-Fatboy Hash aka clean up your shit and finish the keg
-Go the fuck home

Wednesday, May 07, 2014

BH3 Hash #701

What: Cap n' Gown Hash

When: 6pm on Sat, May 10

Where: The Sink

Hares: Cockchester

Hash Cash: $5

Bring: Your parents, a funnel, college hookups, an appetite for making bad choices, ID.

Trail: A-A'

Dog/Stroller Friendly: Bring all the dogs and get an irresponsible teenager to watch your babies.

Monday, April 21, 2014

Boulder 700 Rubik's Cube Hash

What: Boulder Hash's 700th R*n!!

When: 2pm on Sunday, April 27th

Where: Wapos Mexican Cocina 4929 N Broadway Boulder, CO 80304 (Mexican food, not Italian)

Hares: Just Jack and Pippi Dong Stalker

Hash Cash: Sucky sucky five dorra. There will be amazing haberdashery delights distributed to those who pay their $5. It's worth cumming on this trail just for the swag.

Bring: This is a Rubik's cube hash. Come dressed in a combo of the 6 colors of the cube: Green, White, Blue, Orange, Yellow, and Red. For instance, wear a green hat, an orange tie, yellow pinafores, a blue evening gown, and a red thong panty. There will be instructions about cubing at chalk talk and on trail. You will be able to get your favorite shirt back, but my recommendation is to bring things you feel comfortable giving to a new home. There will be no talk of how fast you can solve a Rubik's cube – no one wants to hear that… nerd. Bring your ID.

Trail: A-A, no shiggy, your feet will stay dry, no hills. Maybe one beer check, maybe seven.

Dog/Stroller Friendly: Doggies may have to hang in the car for circle, but they will be stoked (and perhaps stroked) to r*n this trail! Babies are just high maintenance mini humans, if you want to care for them, bring 'em along.

Hash Crash/DD: There are buses that are just itching (you can get crabs from their seats) to be your tig ol' bitties (DD).

Monday, April 07, 2014

[BH3] Boulder Hash 699! 69 with an Extra 9! 3 PM on Saturday April 12th

What: Cocktus Juice's Virgin Boulder Lay! 
Theme: BOULDER BOULDER BOULDER! Welcome Cocktus Juice to Boulder by wearing or bringing anything that to you means Boulder.  
When: Saturday, April 12th and 3 PM, yes, THREE O'CLOCK in the afternoon.
Where: East Boulder: Arapahoe and Westview Drive, by the Anglican Church of the Redeemer. Trail will start just a few tiny steps east up the hill.  https://www.google.com/maps/dir//40.0140462,-105.1942784/@40.0140585,-105.1930017,18z/data=!4m3!4m2!1m0!1m0
Hares: Cocktus Juice and G4  
Hash Cash: $5  
Bring: Bouldery costumes and paraphernalia

Also: A change of shoes wouldn't be stupid.. Warm clothes (outdoor circle).  Jesus, if you can get him to go hashing.

Dog/Stroller Friendly: Sadly, no to both. That means even no-dogs  to Pod's dogs.. 

Hash Crash/DD: Nothing official.
 

 On-on,

G4

--
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Harrier.net
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Friday, March 28, 2014

Boulder Prelube to the Fort Collins Green Dress Run [SPECIAL TIME]

We have another chance to look like idiots in green dresses, better get your liver ready for it...


What: BH3 #698 - FC GDR Prelube
When: Saturday, Bright and Early at the special time of 10am
Where: Martin Park off of Eastman Ave (from S Broadway)
Hares: Beano, Beano, & Beano
Hash Cash: Five Dolla, fünf Denaro, Cinco scrilla
Bring: Virgins, extra cash, A whistle
Trail: A to ∂A/∂t|r, beer checks, green dress shopping checks, you know the usual
Dog/Stroller Friendly: Probably not strollers, I like mud.
Hash Crash/DD: None, we're carpooling up to FC and invading them after the prelube.
D'Erections: Enter this into your sat nav: 39.987874, -105.250593 or link:
Extra Info: Get yourself ready for the FC GDR. There will be an opportunity on trail to get yourself a shiny new green dress for fart collins
--
ON ON
Beano

Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Horny Hash Trail - BH3, March 22

That's right hashers!!! Saturday! Saturday! Saturday!!!! 

Saturday is a hashing day!

The Horny Hash Trail brought to you by Brrrrgggggghhhhh and a mystery hare!  Unicorn? Bull? Wear your horns and show us all how horny you REALLY are!

Date:  March 22
Time:  3:00 pm
Place: Niwot High School, 8989 Niwot High School, Niwot, 80503 
Cost: $7
On After: Bootstrap Brewing Co. 

Expect a 6-7 mile run. Bring change of clothes, warm clothes....etc. 

Call or email me w any questions. 

Brrrrrrgggggghhhhhhh

__._,

Monday, March 10, 2014

5th ANAL Boulder GDR

Due to conflict with Frozen Dead Guy Days the GDR date has changed to 15 March.

What: Boulder 4th Anal Green Dress Run.
When:  March 15th, at 3:30 pm.  Prelube at 3:00 pm.
Where: The Pearl St. Pub in Boulder
Hares:  Pubic Enemy #1, Beano, and David Cockerfield
Hash Cash:  7$, in US Dollars
Bring:  Your ID, A green dress, money for the bars, virgins, rubber duckies, a jar of vaseline, bribes for the hares, and your mother.
Trail:  A-B, Turkey/Eagle.  Not kid friendly or dog friendly.  This is a pub crawl!  The $7 covers pitchers at one pub stop, circle and the on-after.  Beyond that, you should bring extra money for drinks at the bars.

There will be a short circle in Boulder.   The full circle will be at Cockerfield's house in Longmont, where the on-after party will be.  Crash space is available.  Rides by sober drivers will be available to circle / on-after.  Rides will of course be available to get y'all back to yer cars the next morning(ish) if you use crash space.
D'erections.  If you don't know where the Pearl St. Pub in Boulder is, you are a bad person and we will give you an atomic wedgie.


--
ON ON
Beano

--
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@BoulderH3
 
Colorado Info:
Harrier.net
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Tuesday, March 04, 2014

Frozen Mardi Dead Hash Gras!

What: Frozen Dead Guy Days Hash!
When: Sunday, March 9th at 11am
Where: Beautiful Nederland, Colorado. Meet at the Carousel of Happiness.
Hares: Pippi Dong Stalker
Hash Cash: $5 and bring your ID!
Bring: Your ID, clearly. Also, bring beads and boobs, virgins and dry socks. Please bring a used coffin, a tightrope, 3 small toadstools, Mardi Gras masks, and whatever you gave up for Lent.
Trail: It will be a total pavement pounder. Totally.
Dog/Stroller Friendly: Sadly, no to either.
Hash Crash/DD: There is a marvelous bus from Boulder to Ned, aptly called the "N" bus
D'Erections: Please come up early and hit up the pancake breakfast at the community center from 8-11am. Once you are in Ned grab a FDGD guide and check out the map to find the Carousel or ask anyone you see.

Friday, February 21, 2014

Boobs

Boulder ramp up to Mardi Gras hash! #695

What: It's almost Mardi Gras so we should revel in debauchery. 

When: Tomorrow, Saturday the 22nd at 3pm.

Where: Iris Fields: 1536 Jennine Place Boulder, CO 80304 (basically, 16th and Iris)

Hares: It's a secret...

Hash Cash: five bucks

Bring: Beads, boobies, and Hurricanes. Don't forget to think about what you aren't giving up for Lent. Bring virgins for sacrifice, voo doo dolls and craw fish. Oh, and be sure and bring your 

Trail: Doggie friendly and virgin friendly. A-A.

Lost or lonely: 408-836-0683, ask for the butler.

--
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Thursday, February 06, 2014

[BH3] Race to the Altar Hash!

What: Race to the Altar Hash!  Chocolate Salty Balls and Love at First Lick with be getting Civil Unioned... Civil Unionized.. (Colorado Gay Married) on Valentine's Day!  Come and celebrate our last Saturday as single ladies!
 
When: This Saturday, February 8th, at 3PM.  That's right!  3!!
Where: Stazio Ball Fields in Boulder
Hares: Chocolate Salty Balls and Love at First Lick
Hash Cash: Five dolla!
Bring: Wear your finest civil unionization attire, bachelorette garb highly encouraged, tiaras, suits and ties, hawaiian shirts, coconut bras, mardi gras beads, a thirst for not so shitty beer, warm clothes, warmer socks, shag bag (there will be a shag wagon), vagina pariphenalia, penis pariphenalia (if that's more your thing), funny hats, and the newest shiniest shoes you can find; this is a formal affair after all.
Trail: A-B, shitty, shiggy, shaggy
D'erections: Google that sh*t.
 
Lost, lonely, late? Call L@FL-303.520.6925 or CSB-970.488.9290

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Friday, January 31, 2014

SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY - Stupid Bowl Hash!

What:  Special Edition Boulder Hash - Let's have our own pre-game show before the game on Sunday and then convene to a bar to watch the game and devise creative ways for Bruno Mars to meet with an untimely but justifiable death during the half time show.  This will be a real hash, so remember to wear those brand new kicks you're so fond of.
When:  Sunday 2/2 @ 11:00AM!
Where:  East Mapleton Ball Fields, Boulder.  Park on Mapleton between 28th and and 30th.
Hares: Cockchester, Amber Alert, Pippi Dong Stalker
Hash Cash: $5
Bring: Bratwurst, beer bellies, cheerleaders, bros, touchdown dances, dry clothes, and an unwavering belief that God is on the side of the hashers.
Trail: A-A'
Dog/Stroller Friendly:  Dogs will enjoy trail but unless they're over 21 won't be permitted in the bar for the Stupid Bowl.

On On 
Amber Alert


Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Bronco Hash 1/25 @ 2

GOOOOO Broncos Hash!

What: We are Super Sportsball Fans!
When: This Saturday, January 25th at precisely 2 o'cockish
Where: Bobolink Trailhead, Gapter Rd CO 80303
Hares: Mach 1. Whore and Pippi 
Hash Cash: Five bucks
Bring: All your orange Bronco loving garb. Those boys are hitting the big top, so let's show 'em some pride. (if you are a Seahawks fan, we will judge you, but wear your spirit gear and celebrate the sportsball.) Also bring brand new shoes, a lighter, some herb, dead whores, clean socks, and your grandma.
Trail: Bring a sag bag. 
D'erections: Google that sh*t. 

ON ON!
--
Boulder H3 Info:
BoulderH3.org
@BoulderH3

Colorado Info:
Harrier.net